Monday, February 23, 2009

Do me a flavour! The new Walkers crisps tested!

The scene: A quiet boardroom, not far from here. On the table dozens of
packets of crisps and two seats waiting to be filled by...

Our tasters! Miss Katty Blanch, veteran crisptaster and part-time pole dancer and
Mrs Marie-Claire Tovey EAT(dip) TASTE(hons), a chicken fancier
and all round good egg.

Onto the flavours: Builder's Breakfast, Cajun Squirrel, Chilli and Chocolate, Crispy Duck and Hoison, Fish and Chips and Onion Bhaji.

First to the lips was the Builder's Breakfast, a daring feat that is supposed to combine all the magical ingredients of that British institution - the full english - in one crisp. Cup of tea and fag optional.

KB: Hmmm. They have got a nice bacon flavour but that is overwhelmed by an eggy taste.

MCT: I would agree, to me they taste just like bacon flavoured crisps with an after
taste of egg - and that taste hangs around for way too long!

KB: Yes, Mrs Tovey, and maybe it is psychological, but I was sure some of the crisps tasted different to others, ie more tomatoey.

So, final score for Builder's Breakfast 4/10.

Now for the chilli and chocolate. Hmm. How would this one fare?

MCT: Tastes and looks a bit burnt - I couldn't taste
the chocolate but maybe that's just me and my current nasal state. We all have poor tasting days... Anyway they did have a nice chilli kick though but again the taste
hangs around for a little too long!

KB: Why? Who would be so weird as to come up with this flavour?? What was occurring to them? Oi!

MCT: Well, actually chocolate with chilli is quite nice...

KB: Hmm, well, this just smells of burnt vanilla-y chocolate. It's not an unpleasant burnt taste but it does have a weird aftertaste. Just wrong though, overall, in my opinion.

Oh dear, another 4/10 and Walkers seems to be letting itself down with the too much aftertaste.. No one likes to still be tasting crisps hours later do they?

Now for the Fish and Chips, a highly anticipated flavour.

KB: These are my favourite so far! They taste well lush, and that's a technical taster term, and I wouldn’t lie to your face.

MCT: I'm sorry I just can't do it... they smell terrible. I have heard lots of other people say they are awful so I can't subject my poor nasal passages to it really. Apologies!

(and she calls herself a TASTE and DIP!)

KB: Well I like them!! They are not as strong as scampi fries (mmmMMMmmmm scampi fries) but they do leave a distinctly fishy aroma on my fingers. Yum tastic though!

9/10 (from the taster who could be bothered!! ;) )

Now for the controversial Cajun Squirrel, could they live up to the hype?

MCT: No, not really! They taste a bit like barbecue... I am only eating one though (oh for god's sake!) as although they don't have squirrel in them there is something wrong about eating
'squirrel flavoured'..

KB: Well, I am a vegetarian and I have no such qualms, give them here!
Oh, I like the illustration on the packet – very funny. They have an impressive list of ingredients but did exclude said squirrel.

MCT: Thank the lord!

KB: However they are over herbed and spiced and something keeps catching the back of my throat which I suspect may be one of the squirrel’s nuts....

MCT: Hehehehehehe.

KB: In the end they look pretty, but more in the league of fancy crisps, and therefore, do not deliver.

6.5/10 bit disappointing after build up

Onion Bhaji anyone?

KB: For me, this is the most authentic flavoured crisp. But it just doesn't work in my mind because Onion bhajis are well nice and lush...

MCT: Yes, I know what you mean... It's very oniony, tasted like onion bhaji but now you mention it they also taste weird, like... cheese and onion.. yuck.

KB: Yes well... I think they taste real enough but there wasn’t the greasy follow through of loveliness why would you want to eat a crisp rather than the actual bhaji?!

7/10

Lastly, after a palate-cleansing sip of water, the Duck, and Miss Katty Blanch has the first taste..

KB: Nice. But could be nicer – quite a ‘meaty’ flavour but also tastes weirdly of marmite.

Mrs Tovey sadly had to decline the Duck crisps as had quite a heavy cold and felt she wouldn't be on top form.

KB: Shame. Quack Quack
5/10 for the Crispy Duck and Hoison.

So the winner is Fish and Chips, mainly because Mrs Tovey was unable to compete fully due to ill health. Get well soon!

All in all though the flavours seemed pretty disappointing and not as good as they could have been... Oh well! Whose for a packets of Mccoys?

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